Looking for a way to heal yourself from addiction? Here, renowned vocalist and author, Ester Nicholson, lets us in on some keys for how to restore yourself to sanity after problems with drug or alcohol. As always, we invite your comments and feedback at the end!
The insanity of unhealthy beliefs
Insanity is when you do the same thing over and over again expecting different results. It’s like you have this mental blind spot that says, “Oh, I can have a healthy relationship with this person who has thirty days of sobriety, and has pawned my car for drugs for the second time – after all, he’s really trying to do better – and he’s sooo cute.”
I used to joke that I must have an invisible banner stuck to my forehead that read, “All really screwed up, emotionally unavailable guys please come be my man,” because that’s all I seemed to attract. It took quite some time to realize that based on my core wounded belief system, I might as well have had an invisible banner written across my forehead! I was a perfect vibrational chick magnet for men that were just as wounded as I was.
Attracting what you vibrate
I remember one emotionally abusive relationship I was involved in, where I was ready to flee again. I told my spiritual adviser, “I’m out of here.” The pain was so intense, and I was in a constant state of feeling rejected, abandoned, unloved and unwanted.
My adviser response was shocking. She said “Ester, you don’t get to leave this time with the same set of beliefs that drew this relationship to you in the first place. You must stay and do the inner work that will heal your wounds and set you free.” She told me that if I didn’t do the work and just ran away again, I would soon find myself in the same relationship, living in a different zip code with a man wearing a different suit.
It was difficult to stay put and really take a look at the wounds and patterns that had been operating in my life for so long. It was not easy to take my attention off of my relationship with the man in my life and focus on having a relationship with myself. But guess what? I was sick and tired of being sick and tired of having my heart cracked opened again, and again and again, because I had attracted into my life someone that was a perfect match to my feelings of unworthiness and unlovability.
Staying and doing the work
So, instead of fleeing the relationship, I practiced the exercises in Soul Recovery to lift my vibrational frequency to the degree that it was no longer possible to stay in a situation birthed in neediness, unworthiness and pain…and I transitioned with love and grace out of the relationship.
My unhealthy thought patterns from the space of a wounded belief system, mirrored back to me as negative experiences in the form of people and circumstances. Why? Because what I constantly thought about, dreamed about, talked about and believed, had to express in my outer world. It’s the law – a perfect spiritual law that is in operation whether you’re conscious of it or not.
When those unhealthy patterns began to heal through the process of recovering my own sense of wholeness, I began to attract positive experiences in the form of people and circumstances.
Five Keys To Sanity
There are some keys that I used to restore myself to sanity, and I’d like to share them with you.
Admitting that you’re insane is always a great place to start. (LOL)
Acknowledge that of yourself, you can’t stop the insane behavior and that you need help. Powerlessness in addiction recovery is the key to attracting help.
Forgive yourself. From a place of deep compassion, forgive yourself for doing the best you could with where you were at the time. If you could’ve done better, you would have.
Prayer doesn’t convince the Universe that you are worthy and enough. It’s quite aware of that fact. Prayer lines you up with the Universe that is a presence of unconditional love and spiritual power.
Take one step today that is opposite of your usual thoughts and actions – in fact try that for seven days in a row.
Questions about addiction and insanity?
Leave them in the comments section below. And remember to be gentle with yourself. You’ve practiced these patterns for a long time. Through loving discipline, you’ll look up one day in the near future and be surprised that you have been restored to sanity.
Through applying these keys, you will create an opening within your own mind. That’s all God needs is a crack – an opening to take over from there.